By Lori Spensieri
Getting Happy With a Little Positive Psychology
HAPPINESS AS A TEMPERMENT
I have an INFJ personality. This means that I am kind, highly sensitive and apparently I have an old soul. I am not completely sure of what this implies but it sounds good. According to Isabel Briggs Myers there are 4 qualities at exist as a range from one extreme to the other. The four qualities that combine to create your personality are:
1) Interaction with the world (Introvert vs. Extrovert)
2) Absorption of Information (Sensors vs. Intuitive)
3) Decision Making (Thinkers vs. Feelers)
4) Organization (Judgers vs. Perceivers)
Try the quiz here.
Complete the questions to see what personality you have. After you complete the quiz, comment on your results. Do you agree? Is this an oversimplification? Why complete a quiz like this anyway? The benefits are threefold. The first reason is that the results can confirm personal characteristics that you already knew you had, providing a sense of validation. The second reason is that it will help give you insight into the benefits of having such a personality type. Lastly, finding the results will help you to realize that some of your “weaknesses” are simply part of the package and they may actually work in your favor to some degree.
HAPPINESS AS A TEMPERMENT
I bring up Positive Psychology at this point as it is a relatively new idea that fits perfectly with the idea of happiness being part of one’s personality or overall temperament.
Positive psychology has the therapist or patient asking, “What’s Good?” Instead of the usual “What’s Wrong?”
Positive Psychology aims to have the patient see their skills, positive traits and experiences as a benefit to them. As part of treatment, he or she will set goals, practice wellness and methods of building up one’s sense of self confidence and self-esteem. Areas of focus include:
- Decision making
- Goal setting
- Positive Self-concept
- Positive Self-talk
- Relationship building
- Social Skills
- Moving forward
- How experiences have shaped you
Focus away from:
- The past
- Repressed ideas or memories
- past negative experiences
CHOOSE TO SEE
Choose to see the good in any sitation or circumstance. Some common phrases which may sound cliché, can actually be helpful to hold in your repertoire. When something doesn’t work out have a ‘go-to’ phrase ready for use. If you go to a job interview and you are not successful in securing the position, tell yourself that a better job is in the works. If your girlfriend or boyfriend breaks up for you, tell yourself that there is someone more suitable on their way. Try these phrases:
- It is what it is!
- You get what you get and you don’t get upset!
- Maybe next time.
- It wasn’t meant to be.
- I am destined for greater things.
- For every door that closes, two more open.
- This/he/she wasn’t a good fit for me.
- God has other plans for me.
- It’s all good.
- I am only human.
- I am doing my best.
In positive psychology there are many facets and aspects to consider. If you would like to continue reading about this, you can click here for an insightful article by Psychology Today.
Methods in the Book
Many of the methods in the book Thirty Days to Happy, are based on methods based in Positive Psychology.
Day 2 Positive Twist. This method requires the reader to be mindful during the day for circumstances and events that are not desirable. When this happens, he or she is required to record the incident and then attempt to find the positive side of it. Every circumstance has a positive side. Some are harder to find, but it is there.
Click here for a full description of the Positive Twist.
Day 8 Getting There With Gratitude. Being grateful for the people and things in your life is very important. Gratefulness is a sign of appreciation for all of the things that are working for you. Aside from this, if you can find a way to be grateful for the things that do not work out, you will grow as a person.
Click here for a full description of Getting there with Gratitude. This article is on our sister site. This may contain some affiliate links.
If you would like to delve more into the concept of happiness and what it is exactly, click here.
Thank you for reading our blog. I hope that helps you to find more happiness in your life.
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